Lazy Thursday and Triggers

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Is there any research mentioning a Thursday as an unproductive or lazy day?. It happened to me quite sometimes. No, almost every Thursday. Especially during I fast. Not to mention how my lazy day made my subuh running cancelled and rechedule to bed running instead. Ya, the bed feels cozier than the usual subuh. It's no longer called a nap when you take 3 freaking hours after that to wake up. Thus, my unproductive day starts at 10ish. 

Whenever theres a lazy day, most of your time occupied with pensive and deep thoughts across the whole universe. You jump to every socmed and do some judgement and take note some advices. Then you help mom with the dishes and cloths. You continue your day with mobile gaming, and for the time being it's Genshin Impact. You spend and hour or two to complete the quest and continue scrolling your favorite socmeds. Something caught my attention when 10 years ago status pop out on the timeline. It triggers my anxiety coz it shows a conversation between me and N. 

The status

The replies

The moment i read the replies, it tears me apart.  You did ask to accept the person as that person is. It feels surreal and irony when I still accept that person until now regardless how many times that person breaks me to damage state. That person is you, N. In fact, I waited for the longest time until the day you speak up. The reconnection period took a brief than the days you ghosted me after that. Our first ever meeting was bitter than I imagined. That was the first and the last time we met. I wish we had a sushi date at Zanmai, N. Nah, in my dream.

Enough with the reminiscing and false hopes. I occupied my lazy Thursday with nursery visit to look for tomato tree. But I found daun kesum instead. It was dearsarina's ideas in her IG to plant tomato and see how the progress can make you satisfied enough. Not to mention you can harvest them quite a number. Will look for it as soon as possible for my mini garden at berandar.

I ended up my day with a short visit in Decathlon and managed to cross another to buy list of mine--sport bra for running and bag for travel✅️✅️

What about the the trigger you mentioned before? Is it gone away after a few hour out and about? Is it the distraction or part emotional release? As long as I no longer overthink, I would say it's a part of my emotional release. I will always remind myself everyday every second that he no longer want you anymore. For now our rhythym are dissonance and it sound out of tune. 





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